Rock, Paper, Cynic

5 Pick-up Lines for Total Dorks

Thu, 16 May 2013 17:46:27 -0700

5 Pick-up Lines for Total Dorks

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Alright guys, tweet your best geeky pick-up lines to @rockpapercynic under the hashtag #geekypickuplines.

The winner will get a high-five over the internet. SERIOUSLY.

How to Kill a Scientist: a response to the Florida science felony

Fri, 03 May 2013 12:30:36 -0700

How to Kill a Scientist: a response to the Florida science felony

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I actually can't believe this ridiculous situation in Florida.

I'm not saying to hand out medals to every mad scientist on the event of their first contained explosion (although I could get behind that), but there are better ways of handling this than with felony charges and expulsion.

Zombie-Biter: The Guy Who Bites Zombies

Wed, 24 Apr 2013 06:52:09 -0700

Zombie-Biter: The Guy Who Bites Zombies

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But seriously, has anyone tried biting a zombie to see if that turns it back into a human?

Zombie-Biter has. It didn't work.

If I had to choose between killer robots or no bacon?

Thu, 18 Apr 2013 15:17:48 -0700

If I had to choose between killer robots or no bacon?

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NOW YOU KNOW.

Oh, and this drawing (minus the bacon) may look familiar--I used on a section of the website all about how it's readers who make webcomics awesome.

The bacon may look familiar because it's the best thing you've ever eaten.

Facebook Happened Because the Internet Was Out of Opium

Tue, 09 Apr 2013 07:30:40 -0700

Facebook Happened Because the Internet Was Out of Opium

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Now I'm off to endlessly read the Onion articles my friends link to.

Oh, and the Mark Zuckerberg photo in this comic was originally taken by Brian Solis. I pulled it from the Wikimedia Commons.

When the Penguins Strike Back

Wed, 03 Apr 2013 14:53:26 -0700

When the Penguins Strike Back

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And now The March of the Penguins will forever have a sinister meaning in my mind.

I'm Pretty Sure Jesus is a Games of Thrones Fan

Sat, 30 Mar 2013 14:33:39 -0700

I'm Pretty Sure Jesus is a Games of Thrones Fan

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But seriously, Christians only have to wait 3 days for their saviour to return. Game of Thrones fans have to wait 300 days for the next seasons. And A Song of Ice and Fire readers, those poor bastards, have to wait, like, five years.

The Truth About Television In the Digital Age

Mon, 25 Mar 2013 23:48:26 -0700

The Truth About Television In the Digital Age

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And now it's stuck in my head!

You can't always get what you want...

How everyone came to hate the English language

Tue, 19 Mar 2013 08:58:08 -0700

How everyone came to hate the English language

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I before E except after C and basically whenever you feel like it.

I think the problem here is that English is sutured together from so many languages that expecting consistency from it is like expecting Frankenstein's monster not to have a few behavioural quirks.

Every time some idiot says 'SHOOT FOR THE STARS,' this happens

Fri, 15 Mar 2013 16:29:10 -0700

Every time some idiot says 'SHOOT FOR THE STARS,' this happens

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Shoot for the stars! Those little buggers are plotting our doom.

Also, if Super Mario has taught me anything, THEIR BLOOD MAKES YOU INVINCIBLE.

Where my mind goes when people try to 'motivate' me

Fri, 15 Mar 2013 08:30:32 -0700

Where my mind goes when people try to 'motivate' me

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Shoot for the stars! Those little buggers are plotting our doom.

Also, if Super Mario has taught me anything, THEIR BLOOD MAKES YOU INVINCIBLE.

If Disney was honest with its marketing

Tue, 12 Mar 2013 03:46:52 -0700

If Disney was honest with its marketing

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Admit it, you totally heard the Disney music in the back of your head when you saw this.

Walt Disney, copyrighting childhood since 1923.

Disney Owns the Rights to My Childhood

Mon, 11 Mar 2013 15:48:14 -0700

Disney Owns the Rights to My Childhood

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Admit it, you totally heard the Disney music in the back of your head when you saw this.

Walt Disney, copyrighting childhood since 1923.

The Amazing 'Don't Buy Shit' Sale!

Thu, 07 Mar 2013 08:59:16 -0800

The Amazing 'Don't Buy Shit' Sale!

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I mean, buying stuff is pretty cool. I buy stuff all the time! It's that SALE! language kind of gets my back up, you know?

Hug an Artist!

Wed, 06 Mar 2013 05:03:06 -0800

Hug an Artist!

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Seriously, if you have an artist you admire, go send them an email or a tweet or something short and personal. Many of you probably are artists, so you know how good it fees when you find out someone is actually looking at your stuff.

Also, as the diagram shows, artists literally don't have arms until they get feedback. It's a weird physiological thing that we should probably start researching or something.